Who do you turn to when times are rough?

As we start to settle back in Virginia, things have not gotten any easier. The house is getting back in order though, and my Air Force family has graciously provided us meals for a while. I’m going to be real with you, our family still needs prayer, which I know many of you still are praying. The Devil has layed it on our family so thick it’s hard to breathe right now. Part of me thinks back to the book of Job. Our story is no where near Job’s, but it certainly feels like it. Not only have we lost Harrison, it seems like everything else is crashing.

I understand that early in marriage, things are supposed to be rough. For some juvenile reason, Sum 41′s In Too Deep lyrics come to mind:

The faster we’re falling,
We’re stopping and stalling.
We’re running in circles again
Just as things were looking up
You said it wasn’t good enough.
But still we’re trying one more time.

Maybe we’re just trying too hard.
When really it’s closer than it is too far

Cause I’m in too deep, and I’m trying to keep,
Up above in my head, instead of going under.
Cause I’m in too deep, and I’m trying to keep,
Up above in my head, instead of going under.
Instead of going under.

 

Emily and I have been trying so hard to do things right. But no matter what we do it feels like we are sinking, or get the shaft. For instance, we are trying to get ahold of the death certificate. We were told it would take 7-10 business days for it to be sent. Harrison went to the Lord on the 29th, so that time period has long gone. On our way back we tried to pick it up, only to be told it wasn’t in. Ok, fine, things get held up. I tried to call today only to be told there is no way to tell me over the phone if its even arrived. So I have to drive 2 hours one way to find out. If it’s not there (after waiting 40 minutes in line) then we just wasted 4 hours. The devil has attacked us financially, emotionally, spiritually, and any other way possible. I feel like we are being kicked¬†repeatedly¬†while already down.

So we have turned to the only person possible, God. Through all of this we have trusted that He will take care of us. We have not waivered on this belief, but it has not made it any easier. We have not changed our belief that God won’t give us anything we can handle, but we are still human. We have been broken down, battered, but I promise you, we will still praise God through this. We know somehow, someway, we will come out of this stronger than ever. God has brought Emily and I closer than ever, both to each other and to Him.

 

Friends, I ask that you specifically pray that God surrounds us with His comfort. I want to say thank you so much for the kind words and support that you have poured on, its close to the only thing thats kept us going. We love all of you.

 

God Bless,

James and Emily

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About harrisonjamesmummert

This is a blog to update everyone on our son Harrison, and all of the feelings and emotions that go along with Trisomy 18.
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16 Responses to Who do you turn to when times are rough?

  1. Rebecca Johnson says:

    Praying for you, Emily and your families. May God’s Love surround you and bring you Peace.

  2. Shemekia says:

    Praying for you and your family.

  3. kara says:

    I hear what you are saying. Alex and I went through exactly the same emotions after Sophia died. It was the worst part…..after the service after family leaves..thats when your mind starts going because you have so much time to think. You guys are in my heart.

  4. Erica says:

    I’m continuing to pray for you all. I wish I would read a blog from you saying it was getting easier bc I’m so afraid my hurt will never go away. We delivered Baylee on Thursday June 14 and she passed on Thursday also. We buried her Monday and it’s so hard. I know God is with us but like you said we are still human and the pain is real. My husband and I have been through so much and I’m praying the pain only continues to draw is closer to God and to each other. Praying for you and for all families hurt by trisomy 18.

  5. Sherry Cwiakala says:

    Psalm 22:24
    For he has not been unmoved by the pain of him who is troubled; or kept his face covered from him; but he has given an answer to his cry.
    I know sometimes it seem God is so far away in times of pain but He hears, He does not turn away, He will comfort. That is my prayer for you two today.

    • Maria says:

      Reminds me of the shortest verse in the Bible…”Jesus wept.” He took the time to sit with Lazarus’ sisters and just grieve with them even though he knew the outcome of their story. Praying today that you feel God’s peace surround you and, in times of grief…know that He is grieving along with you.

  6. Dana says:

    I found your blog through sweet Nora’s blog. First off, I’m so sorry for your loss. I pray for strength for the 2 of you. I also follow another blog of a sweet baby boy that was taken too soon due to cancer. The mommy who writes the blog has found comfort when desperately needed it through the MISS foundation. I’m not sure if it has been mentioned to you but it’s specifically for bereaved parents & their families. Maybe it could help you & yours either sometime down the road or now. Just thought I would pass the word on to you. Missfoundation.org is the site.

  7. ruthyeffler says:

    Sending lots of prayers to you and your family.

  8. Elizabeth says:

    At three months out, I can tell you that it is already (a little bit) easier. Grief feels pretty cyclical; you will have good days and bad days. Try to keep yourself filled with as much joy as you can….but also take the time to sincerely mourn your child. Listen to meaningful music and cry. Talk to each other with sincere honesty. Men and women certainly grieve differently (and everyone is unique in their own grief patterns), but as a spouse…one of the best things you can do is simply be present. You don’t necessarily even have to talk about it, especially if you only one of you is having a good day while the other is having a bad day…just be physically present by sitting together. A few things that helped us a little bit were: 1) Planting a tree- we chose one that was in currently in bloom so that it would bloom every year at this special time, 2) Creating a memory box- this was a nice way to stow away sentimental pictures, cards, and items…a way to look at them when we need to, and tuck away when we don’t, 3) Getting outside- this is cumbersome when it is hot, but it really does lift you up…even if you don’t “feel like going!”, 4) We started the Greensboro “Diaper Drive”- we joined with Teeny Tears (http://teenytears.blogspot.com/) and began creating something for other families to help them as they tread this same path…and also as a way to memorialize our son.

    Love and prayers to you both!
    Elizabeth Hepler

  9. Elizabeth says:

    One quick P.S. If you haven’t ever been to http://www.99balloons.org/about.php, check it out. This is a nonprofit organization started by Eliot’s parents (I’m sure you’ve seen this, but this is the 99 balloons video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=th6Njr-qkq0; it aired on Oprah in 2008.)

    Matt’s Dad blogs here: http://theatypicallife.com/blog/ They have an amazing family, have been where you (and we) are presently, and are very uplifting.

  10. John says:

    God’s grace is sufficient. Its more than enough. We must continue to look up to where the help comes from. Our Lord has never left us and will continue to supply. Mom and I love you guys so much and will always keep you in our prayers trusting God’s will for all of us.
    Papa

  11. Amanda from Cincy says:

    Praying most definitely for comfort and peace. Praying that God would provide for you and Emily in every way you need and for ways you can’t predict. And praying that the Holy Spirit will guard your hearts and minds against attacks, defeat, sadness, confusion and ill-will. Praying you can hand those worries over each day and love each other deeper because Christ loves you more.

  12. I do not know you guys, but this verse came to mind after reading your post today:
    “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ… who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” 2Cor. 1:4

    May the Lord comfort you as He has comforted us. T18 is a hard journey, but He is able to turn our mourning to dancing in the end.

  13. Natalie says:

    Many prayers are being said thinking of you too in this rough tiime. Prayers Prayers Prayers everything starts to look back up for the two of you

  14. Cindi says:

    It was wonderful to see you this week, Em, and to finally meet James. To see the tiny footprint tattoo memorial on the outside that represents that love that is stamped forever on your heart inside! Hang on to our Savior and to one another! Satan is no wuss, and he knows how to fight dirty. But our Savior has already won your victory, so all will be well. His grace is sufficient! You’ll be telling us how he brought you through this time in another post not too long from now. “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” – Isa 43:2

  15. Cora Ullery says:

    James – I have commented before, but I am sure you are quite busy taking care of your beautiful wife! As I have said prior…I lost my duaghter to Trisomy 18 too. What I am finding oddly convenient yet strange is that I also read Nora’s blog and pray for her all.the.time! And when you blogged about her family and how you drove a short distance to meet them…and then how your tattoo was done by Glenn Scott – I started to put all the pieces together. I am from the Dayton area…I am assuming you are near? I would love to help in ANY way with the 5k and my husband and I would LOVE to run in it as well….for Emma, for Harrison, for Nora! Please contact me via email at ullerycrew@roadrunner.com. I feel this is soooo like Him to have placed us all so close.

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